Those popes who bear the name, "Pius," are the greatest guardians of the Church against heresy. This blog is a watchdog for modernism in the Church. In reality, outside this blog, the members of the board temper their criticisms and opinions with prudence and charity so as to help souls in their journey towards Christ. But sometimes, for the sake of their own sanity, the authors of this blog just need to blow off some steam. The result is Totus Pius.

20 June 2007

More Liturgical Nonsense

Today, We came across an intriguing post on Fr. John Zuhlsdorf's blog, What Does the Prayer Really Say? In the last few months, WDTPRS has become one of the first stops on Our daily blog tour. Fr. Z is to be commended for his commentary on the pressing issues of the day, his podcasts, his fantastic pictures of Rome, and his refreshing good sense. We heartily tip our tiara in his honor, +[[[:-)

The post in question concerns Bishop Donald Trautman of Erie, PA, who chairs the Bishops' Committee on Liturgy, and his attitude toward the vernacular translation of the Mass. To quote Fr. Z,

"It boils down to this: you are too stupid to understand an accurately translated prayer. Because you are too stupid, because the prayers are tooo haaard for you to understand, His Excellency wants to you have mashed carrots and goop instead of a rare T-Bone and structured Cab, like mommy and daddy do for their kiddies."

Then, we are treated to a "Mass of Trautman" (originally from The Cafeteria is Closed) which takes this principle of dumbing down the liturgy to its logical conclusion. Here, re-posted for your enjoyment, is the Creed, but We encourage you to read the whole thing for yourself.
ALL: We like God. God is cool and really nice because He made me and this whole world – which by the way – we are totally polluting and it’s getting hot. Jesus was born in a little barn and every Christmas we have a play during church but then he died. But you know what? He loves me and wants me to be happy. There’s this spirit that talks to us in a book and he makes things live. I like my church because everyone here is so nice and the priest is nice and we sing nice songs about nice stuff and later when we get old and icky, after we die, we all get to go to heaven with Jesus. He’s really cool by the way. Amen.
Well, maybe not to its logical conclusion. But close enough. +[[[;-)

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